Baby Love

      




     I find in those quiet moments with Mya, it really hits me. It's incredible when you really stop and think about it. This beautiful little being, who grew so perfectly inside my belly not so long ago, is now looking at me--her mother, and expecting me to teach her to be the person who she is going to be in life. Thankfully she has an incredible daddy as well who also holds that exact same weight of responsibility and who takes it just as seriously as I do.

      I remember the first time that I felt Mya kick inside of me, it was not only amazing and wonderful..but it also made me start to realize the reality of what was to come. Terry and I are now responsible for helping to make this tiny little human being into a loving, caring, responsible, successful, confident, wonderful human being. Her childhood and the way that we raise her will in many ways impact the paths that she chooses in life, the way that she feels about herself, the way that she feels about others and the way that she lives her life as an adult. Her childhood is a pretty powerful thing and knowing how critical these first few years are to anyone's development and sense of self, we don't take it lightly. She will one day look back on her childhood, years from now...and I don't want her to think of it as anything but magical. I want to create incredible memories for her that she will cherish and want to relive with her own children one day. I want her to have memories of chocolate chip pancake Saturdays where we sit in our jammies at the kitchen table and watch dad flip pancakes and smother them in icing sugar and syrup..as much as you'd like, because that's ok if it's only once a week. I want her to remember early morning snuggles in bed together, crawling in between her mom and dad and getting smothered in kisses from both sides. I want her to remember baking with her mom, measuring all of the ingredients, licking the spoon and getting egg shells in the cookie dough..which is ok, because it's how we learn.

Pancake Saturday!

I want her to remember the silly impromptu dancing that we do together in the kitchen as I make dinner and sing show tunes at the top of my lungs to her as she giggles and wiggles that sweet tiny body of hers. I want her to remember the random duets that her mom and dad sing together on long car rides to keep her from crying in the backseat--and she happens to have a dad who never in a million years thought he'd be caught dead singing..but he does it because it makes her laugh, keeps her tears in, and works every time. I want her to feel the excitement that I feel around the holidays (every single holiday) and be thrilled to wake up to a house decorated with hearts and candies on Valentine's Day and have special Christmas traditions that she'll begin to expect and love each and every year.

 I want her to live with a mom and dad who are happy--not stressed, sad, snippy or angry. I have learned from my own wonderful parents that when a child's parents are happy, it makes them feel secure, safe and happy themselves. I want that for Mya. I want her to remember the little love notes that I'll write her and sneak into her lunchbox at school, just to remind her that I love her and that I hope that she has a good day. I want her to remember her mom and dad helping her into her swimsuit when it's raining outside so that we can all go run and play in the pouring rain together. I want her to come home after school to the smell of cookies baking in the oven, ready just in time for her to try the first one. I want her to have memories of a house full of laughter and love and ultimately a childhood that she can look back on and not want to change.

      Whenever I'm feeling overwhelmed, frustrated, sleep deprived or impatient throughout this journey of parenthood, I always remind myself that Mya will remember everything. I remind myself that every experience in her life will help to shape who she is and every choice that I make towards her or around her will impact her in one way or another. I want her to look back and see that even in times of struggle and stress, she was loved and adored. The familiar line "I am the way I am because my mother/father did [insert negative memory here] when I was little" rings in my ear as I think about how I want to raise Mya. This sweet little girl will watch my every move, will hear my every word and will learn how to be a girl/woman by seeing my example. She will also learn how to be in a relationship by watching Terry and I together. She will learn how she is supposed to be treated by men by watching how her dad treats me and she will see how she is supposed to treat her spouse one day by watching how I treat Terry. What an incredible responsibility both Terry and I have...and we love every exhausting, hard, incredible, wonderful minute of it!